As far as I've seen, all of the "responsibility" documents say more or less the same thing:
1) EOR must give detailer all of the information that they need to sort out the detailing without making reference other documents such as the code. This can, and usually is, done by way of details that are general in nature rather than specific. They'll show you a detail to apply to all joints of a sort rather than a detail for each particular joint.
2) Detailer must use EOR drawings to prepare bar placement drawings which are then reviewed by the EOR to see that they satisfy the EOR's intent.
So it's a two step process. EOR gives you stuff to work with; you give them something to review.
Based on what you've shown us so far, it seems that the EOR has done an insufficient job of step #1. Shame on them. Moreover, most EOR's would be grateful -- although perhaps not happy -- to have the detailer report congestion problems before everything gets out to the field. Again, shame on your EOR for, apparently, failing to appreciate your help in that regard.
So what to do? I see two avenues of resolution:
1) Keep asking for the additional details until you get them.
2) Do your best to detail things yourself per the code. This has some advantages and disadvantages:
DISADVANTAGE: You have to sink more time into the work and run the risk that the EOR will reject it and make you do it over again. Truly, it's not fair to you. That said, you're obviously spending a fair bit of time and energy trying to coerce the EOR into being helpful. Which route is the most costly for your firm is your call.
ADVANTAGE: When all is said and done, the detailing will be the EOR's responsibility, including any congestion problems. So at least you don't have to worry about that.
If it were me, at this point, I'd probably do this:
1) Send the EOR something in writing saying that you've identified congestion issue and you fear that the joints will not be constructable on site and/or will result in lousy concrete consolidation. Copy your client who is, presumably the general contractor.
2) Send the EOR something in writing saying that, since you're flying blind with the connection details, your firm will be seeking remuneration for any associated rework that is necessary. Copy your client.
3) Take a stab at detailing the connections without the extra information from the EOR.
If your EOR has any business acumen at all, or reports to someone who does, they'll start cooperating before you get to step three. It sounds as though you've already made a hearty attempt at banging the cooperation/responsibility drum. Some folks only respond when you switch gears and start speaking the language of consequences.
I like to debate structural engineering theory -- a lot. If I challenge you on something, know that I'm doing so because I respect your opinion enough to either change it or adopt it.