I have been following this topic for a bit because it is very similar to a structure we just designed. Our structure was a roughly 80'x80' square structure with CMU walls at the bottom 2 levels on three sides with concrete over steel deck. Above these two levels was wood framed diaphragm and roof and walls. The shear walls were only located at the perimeter, on three sides - the front was open. We too had a roughly 35' tall retaining wall and went through months of coordination, back and forth, around in circles designing many different options. We looked at H-piles, cantilever stepped walls, cantilever sloped walls, using Geofoam infill behind the wall, soil nails, buttresses and using the diaphragm and shear walls to brace the wall. Additionally the walls on the rear of the building were approximately 12' from the property line and on the sides were 3 to 9'. This project was wind controlled with a higher Kzt due to local topography and based on the soil characteristics we were in SDC A.
When trying to use the diaphragms and shear walls we needed to use the online tools from Vulcraft/Verco to design the diaphragms as the publications didn't come close to what we needed capacity wise. We ended up with around 7" concrete over 3", 16 ga deck with double rows of welds at 6" o.c. and perimeter and sidelaps with around 7 ksi concrete (if my memory recalls correctly). We ran other options as well and when going thinner ended up in the 10 ksi concrete range. Additionally thinner didn't always work for gravity as these spans were long due to architectural needs and the fact that little to nothing stacked - Not a Feasible Option
The H-Piles at this location were W14x426 spaced at 5' o.c., embedded into soil rock around 40' additionally this is in a remote location up a long windy and in some places narrow road - Not a Feasible Option
The stepped and tapered walls were similar, with around 30" thick at the base - The client didn't like this thickness and the contractor claimed they could not build this due to how close it was to the property line and being that there were other structures up the hill from this site.
Geofoam infill was liked, but again, not able to be constructed per the contractor.
Buttresses were a similar constructability issue.
A few Geotechs were bought on board and a few soil nail companies looked at it and eventually one company put together a plan to build a soil nail wall that acted as a permanent retaining wall and could be constructed from the top down. The top 12' or so was to be geofoam following the natural grade (infill) to reduce any loads at the top of the wall where it was relying on the building structure for "retaining" and then below that level the soil nail wall did all the work. Their engineers were not worried about deflection of the wall, claiming their wall would deflect almost immediately upon building and stated, in writing, their wall would not impart any loads on our structure for the duration of the building life. Additionally a gap with compressible geofoam was place between their wall and the building structure.