MaryD2...I'm not in So. California, but there are not likely any "industry standards" for residential driveways. Given that, let's set about getting you a good driveway!
A 4-inch thick slab at 3000 to 4000 psi is adequate to carry typical car or light truck loads...the problem is that you will likely get 3 inches in some places, 5 in others. This will promote "random" cracking, as will other issues to be discussed.
To compensate, I would suggest you specify a 5-inch thickness with an undertolerance of 1/4-inch and an overtolerance of 3/8-inch. This will keep the thickness within a reasonable range. Specify a concrete strength of at least 3000 psi, and slump of about 5 inches, but not more than 6 inches.
Next, make sure you have control joints that are properly placed and timely cut. You don't need "expansion" joints as many contractors like to call them. Make sure that you have a joint every 10 to 12 feet, no more, in every direction. The jointed areas should be as nearly square as practicable. The joints should be saw-cut into the concrete within 8 hours after placement and should be cut a least 1-inch deep in a 5 inch slab, preferable 1-1/4 inches deep. Make sure the surface finish is a light broom finish, not a heavy broom finish.
If you make sure the subgrade is flat and compacted, and you place these controls on the concrete, you are likely to get a relatively good result.
Refer to ACI publications for Slabs on Grade for more info.
Good luck.
Ron