Total steps is the number of times it iterates without reaching the convergence tolerance before it gives up. If you set it too low, it might not be able to converge in time. If you set it too high and the structure is pretty flexible, it might never converge and will take forever. You want this to be in a range where it converges before stopping, but don't just put it at 1000000000 since any problems with your model will keep you stuck in an analysis loop.
Convergence tolerance is what you tell the program to shoot for before considering the nonlinear analysis "complete." Essentially, after an iteration, SAP will total something like the net support reactions - and this will never be quite equal to 0 for most nonlinear cases. So you tell SAP, "as long as the total unbalanced force after the run is less than X force - I think we are close enough to call the analysis there and I trust the results within a few percent." I'm not sure what exactly the convergence tolerance input is for SAP, sometimes they let you put in a scalar and it takes the total applied load times that scalar as the convergence tolerance so you don't have to manually update it every time the load input changes. For example, if I apply 1000 kips of force to a model with a 0.05 convergence tolerance, once the unbalanced load comes out below 50 kips - the nonlinear analysis will consider itself "converged."
Null steps - not too sure. My guess is maybe that SAP skips steps that produce the same results as previous iterations?