I have never done any utility work, but I've worked with plenty of utility engineers and I can guarantee that they will use a much smaller demand factor than we would typically use on the NEC side of things. I can't give you any good rules of thumb on a demand factor to use. But I can give you the following tidbits which might help point you in the right direction:
+ Utilities seem to size their transformers at about 50% to 75% of what we would size them at (which is often based on connected load or 75-80% of connected load).
+ There are quite a few articles out there about the philosophy behind NEMA TP-1 transformers (Energy Star high-efficiency transformers). A lot of research has been performed on transformer loading, and most of it seems to indicate that most small transformers are loaded to something like 30% of nameplate.
You might want to contact some utility engineers and see if they can give you some pointers on transformer sizing (just curious -- GOTWW, are you a utility engineer? If not, how come you're sizing a utility transformer?).
Also, I'd forget about your 80*3=240A starting point for your calculations. I'd think a better bet would be to get some good rule of thumb numbers for w/sf for residential and start there. Unfortunately, I can't give you any guidance there, either, most of my work is in commercial/industrial. But, my guess would be about 3 w/sf. Assuming 3x 2500sf houses, that would be 15 kVA demand. DON'T BASE YOUR DESIGN ON THIS. But this does indicate that your calcs may be high. And maybe someone else can throw out some better w/sf numbers.
Actually, after taking a look at NEC Table 220.3(A), I'm starting to think even 3w/sf might be high for residential for utility purposes. . . .