I'm the one who's daughter is disabled. The mercury switches I use are placed in steel or aluminum tubes then are sealed with hotglue or epoxy. There's little worry about leakage since they're sealed. Granted, what can be sealed can become unsealed, but you are really going to have to work hard at unsealing these. Irresponsible, no. Ignorant, only if you think I'm going to be irresponsible with such materials.
In my area, mercury switches are easy to get. I can get them at Radio shack, electrical industrial warehouses, and just about any where else that serves an industry that needs such things. However, I am open to using something less hazardous than mercury because it’s my preference. I had considered using a small ball bearing, BB, et al in a metal tube with a contact at one end. However, there’s the arcing factor that could make the toy stop working. I’ve considered using nitrogen to keep the carboning of the contacts, but I’m not sure if this is worthwhile if there’s something else that’s readily available. Also, injecting nitrogen may be more work than it’s worth.
The advantage of the mercury switch is it’s not direction sensitive. You don’t have to be concerned if the child is holding the device correctly. If there’s something else that’s off the shelf, I’ll be most appreciative to be informed.