This appears deeply bizarre.
rpm63 says his (ok, so there's a maybe 1% chance of him being a her...apols if so!) FEA and hand calcs agree, which implies that shear deflection is not significant, and that there's no major problem with the FEA. rpm63: could we possibly ask for the formulae you used for finding the force for a given deflection?? (Along with the E values, etc.)
[If shear deflection is turned off for the beams and shells this would make the analysis over-stiff compared with reality, as observed. However, the solid element models should shear correctly, and anyway, the shell element calcs would normally have shear in.]
I would be astonished if E was even 20% wrong, let alone 30%-50%! Some titaniums can vary by maybe 10% from published values, but most materials are pretty reliable for elastic stiffness. The small deflections rpm63 is imposing don't look as if they could possibly be yielding the materials mentioned (which would also cause real forces to be below analysis). rpm63: what is the max stress calculated in the beams??
The use of both a simply supported and cantilever geometry should at least show a difference in results if fixturing is defective (which it "fixturing" well could be, even for such a simple set up).
Given all this I would tend to suspect the test setup, though it does seem like the easy way out. rpm63: how are you recording deflection? If you are using crosshead travel, this can be significantly in error for small initial movements (depends on machine a lot). Using an ordinary dial gauge or even a simple scale on the part might be a prudent check (apologies if this obvious and you've done all this stuff).
Please don't let this one die off...this sort of discrepancy between reality and analysis can be very enlightening, as well as intriguing and fun.