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Engineering Lexicon

Engineering Lexicon

Engineering Lexicon

I think we can all agree that we have probably used at least one of these phrases in our careers, but others tend to read into what we say.  I hope these translations are helpful (They are perfectly acceptable phrases in my book).

Engineer: A number of different approaches are being tried.
Translation: We are still grasping at straws.

Engineer: We’re working on a fresh approach to the problem.
Translation: We just hired three kids fresh out of college.

Engineer: We’ve maintained close project coordination.
Translation: We know whom to blame.

Engineer: It’s a major technological breakthrough.
Translation: Well, it works okay, but it looks very hi-tech.

Engineer: Customer satisfaction is assured upon delivery.
Translation: We are so far behind schedule, the customer will be happy to just get it.

Engineer: Preliminary operational test were inconclusive.
Translation: The damn thing blew up when applied power to it.

Engineer: The test results were extremely gratifying.
Translation: We surprised ourselves, the thing actually worked.

Engineer: The entire concept will have to be abandoned.
Translation: The only person who understood the thing quit.

Engineer: That action item is in process.
Translation: It’s so wrapped up in red tape it’s hopeless.

Engineer: Please review and initial.
Translation: Thanks for sharing the responsibility of any mistakes.

Engineer: Please, give us the benefits of your thoughts.
Translation: We’ll hear you out, but won’t implement anything you suggest if it interferes with something we have already done.

Engineer: Give us your interpretation.
Translation: I can’t wait to hear you make a fool of yourself.

Engineer:  Can I see you in my office for a moment?
Translation: I want to brag about the 84 I shot during the weekend.

Engineer: This is a new design, it’s cutting edge.
Translation: The thing isn’t interchangeable with any of out previous designs.

Engineer: This thing is robust.
Translation:  It thing is too heavy to lift alone.

Engineer: It’s very lightweight.
Translation:  You can move it, as long as you don’t mind getting a hernia.

Engineer: After years of development we’re ready.
Translation: After too many years, we finally got one to work.

Engineer:  It’s very low maintenance.
Translation: It’s impossible to fix.

Ray Reynolds
"There is no reason anyone would want a computer in their home."
Ken Olson, president, chairman and founder of Digital Equipment Corp., 1977
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RE: Engineering Lexicon

Sales: We don't want it right, we want it tommorow.
(who cares if it doesn't work, that's what service engineers are for, let's just try and get some of our investment back before we all retire)

RE: Engineering Lexicon

Mad Mango;
A superb and entertaining post.

(I intended to add a smiley, but it wouldn't work.)

Buy a dictionary, keep it nearby and USE it. Webster's New World Dictionary of American English is recommended, and Webster's Collegiate Dictionary.

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