Alpine
I'm so sorry to hear that you are having difficulties. A slight change in fortune could certainly put my firm in the same boat as yours as well, so it is indeed a scary time for many of us.
If we hadn't received an NTP for a major project last month, i was ready to mothball the office (still have 1.5 years of lease to pay) and start work for a transportation engineering company (bridge engineer) with the capacity to snag some of the upcoming US stimulus. Already had to layoff both our engineers in the last 3 months, so it's now down to just me and my wife (accountant).
If I can impart any useful advice, it is this...don't hang on for the sake of hanging on and throw your money (and retirement) down a rat hole. Do what you need to do to protect your family's finances, even if means some personal pain. This is no ordinary recession. With numerous core economic industries teetering on the edge of insolvency, there is the real possibility that a full blown depression could be around the corner.
To paraphrase a common colloquialism, when juggling what life throws at you, there are rubber balls and glass balls. Careers are rubber balls that bounce back when dropped. Your family are the glass balls.
I always chose to put family first, no matter what it took. In earlier lean years, I even chose to accept an assignment (as a former employee) halfway across the US during the last slowdown and live apart from my family for 6 months in order to get back on our feet. The company I worked for tried to force me to move the family out there, but it just wasn't right for them at the time, so I declined and they forced an ultimatum. Since our finances were stable again, I opened this office back home. (I hate ultimatums)
I hope you find work to keep your company alive, but if not, don't beat yourself up. Do what need to be done.
Best wishes for your success.