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"Damp Squids"
3

"Damp Squids"

"Damp Squids"

(OP)
TV producers, desperate to fill 2-300channels with something besides re-runs of just about everything ever made whatever the quality. discovered the bottomless well of list making:
"The 10/20/50/100 top actors/films/pop songs/comedy/drama/quizes/holiday destinations/etc."
And "as voted for by you-the-viewer/Daily Mail readers/Sun page 3 viewers/Guardian Columnists etc"

The cost is simple and they spice it up with C-list celebrities who act as talking heads but often have little or no obvious relevance to the list in question beyond a good agent and a low fee.

Well, for want of anything better to do, and in line with the many meaningless things Universities do today, Oxford has compiled its list of:
"The ten most irritating phrases"

Here is their list:
The top ten most irritating phrases:

1 - At the end of the day

2 - Fairly unique

3 - I personally

4 - At this moment in time

5 - With all due respect

6 - Absolutely

7 - It's a nightmare

8 - Shouldn't of

9 - 24/7

10 - It's not rocket science

(http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/newstopics/debates/3394545/Oxford-compiles-list-of-top-ten-irritating-phrases.html)

This being Eng-Tips, I know we can do better.

JMW
www.ViscoAnalyser.com
 

RE: "Damp Squids"

(OP)
Er, maybe I should take a leaf out of the TV producers book and suggest we start with a list of lists such as:
"The ten most irritating things Managers say."
"The ten most popular excuses for the project failing"

So I'll accept responses in those categories or favourite irritating expressions at work with their categories.
Just so we can keep it organised. Who knows, maybe we will produce some FAQs.

Under the 10 most irritating things managers say is, for example, "Let's run it up the flag and see who salutes it", "Baby steps" and so on.

JMW
www.ViscoAnalyser.com
 

RE: "Damp Squids"

The ten most irritating things Managers say:

Here is one for starters:

1.    You're fired!!!!
 

RE: "Damp Squids"

2. It's done, just not finished.

RE: "Damp Squids"

Alongside the list of irritating phrases (and numbers 4, 8,9 and 10 match my personal pet hates - though I've always dreamt of using a variant of 5 - "with all respect due under the circumstances" - but never had the courage to)...

How about a list of mutant phrases that have lost both meaning and origin.

1.  Slot Chit (originally Slop Chit?)

2.  Not my end of ship (originally part of ship?)

3.  Damp squid (squib?)

u.s.w.

A.

RE: "Damp Squids"

Words that I dread hearing in an engineering context:

1.  Hopefully.


Non-words that grate:

1.  Preventative.


 

Mike Halloran
Pembroke Pines, FL, USA

RE: "Damp Squids"

I think Oxford has stolen my thunder.  Who's he?

RE: "Damp Squids"

I'd prolly say that this supposit top ten list is just a way for upidies to get attention and feel better about themself.  With all due respect, I personally feel that at the end of the day, this sort listing isn't fairly unique and shouldn't of been bothered with.  At this moment in time, this really isn't rocket science, except that for some of us, it really is.  So, yeah, this is absolutely a bit of a 24/7 nightmare.

Matt Lorono
CAD Engineer/ECN Analyst
Silicon Valley, CA
Lorono's SolidWorks Resources
Co-moderator of Solidworks Yahoo! Group
and Mechnical.Engineering Yahoo! Group

RE: "Damp Squids"

On the other hand, moving forwards...

- Steve

RE: "Damp Squids"

Saw this on another forum just now: "Where there's much there's brass!"

- Steve

RE: "Damp Squids"

(OP)
But since that wasn't the grammar forum, the poster did not get pulled up about his spelling of "muck" as "much".

(It was a Temptation, I'll admit, as being so often the recipient of corrections, that I long to correct others with exactly the right amount of shock and condensation.*)




(*O.K., Condescension).
 

JMW
www.ViscoAnalyser.com
 

RE: "Damp Squids"

"I hear what you're saying"

I tend to find it's a phrase which has a silent suffix of either "but I don't give a toss what you think" or "but I am so clueless that you might be speaking in a different language"
  

----------------------------------
  
If we learn from our mistakes I'm getting a great education!
 

RE: "Damp Squids"

I always liked the prefix: "It's not that..."

E.g.

"It's not that you're wrong"

Translation

"You are wrong"

RE: "Damp Squids"

As spoken by politicians in Australia, "This is about---", means "This has nothing to do with---".

RE: "Damp Squids"

Two of the most irritating for me:

1. "Baked-in"

2. "So what you're saying is..." followed by repeating what I had just said verbatim.

 

RE: "Damp Squids"

1. Starting a sentence with "I mean..."
when they haven't said anything yet to explain what they meant by that.
Usually I wouldn't have cared what they said, let alone, what they meant by it.

2. "Like, you know..." makes the veins in my forehead pop out!!!

3. "That being said,..."

"That being said, I mean, like, you know"

Rerig

RE: "Damp Squids"

"I mean", "Basically", "At the end of the day", etc. are no more than verbal ticks.  Worse, they are contagious.  Put a crowd of engineers together for any length of time and ticks like this will spread throughout them.

- Steve

RE: "Damp Squids"

Make that "verbal tics".  Oops.

- Steve

RE: "Damp Squids"


I liked the verbal 'ticks'.  It gave me the image of a bit of bad language sinking its head into some warm, soft, hidden part of your skin, feeding off of your blood, and growing until it got HUGE and noticeable to everyone.

"If you are going to walk on thin ice, you might as well dance!"

RE: "Damp Squids"

"Best practice" has always irritated me.  You mean nothing could possibly be better?

Joe
SW Office 2008 SP5.0
P4 3.0Ghz 3GB
ATI FireGL X1

RE: "Damp Squids"

Quote:

I mean", "Basically", "At the end of the day", etc. are no more than verbal ticks.  Worse, they are contagious.  Put a crowd of engineers together for any length of time and ticks like this will spread throughout them.

Similar to how zombies and vampires spread.

Matt Lorono
CAD Engineer/ECN Analyst
Silicon Valley, CA
Lorono's SolidWorks Resources
Co-moderator of Solidworks Yahoo! Group
and Mechnical.Engineering Yahoo! Group

RE: "Damp Squids"


Long story short...

usually means endless droning about unimportant details, told out of sequence, with complete disregard to its relevance to the point of the story.

"If you are going to walk on thin ice, you might as well dance!"

RE: "Damp Squids"

(OP)
"Damp Squid"
See the link in the opening post for why this thread is headed this way.... it is one of the examples collected.

JMW
www.ViscoAnalyser.com
 

RE: "Damp Squids"

Under the radar...

RE: "Damp Squids"

level playing field...

No more things should be presumed to exist than are absolutely necessary - William of Occam

RE: "Damp Squids"

"We're trying to get our arms around [whatever the task is]..."

"We're building a framework that will anable us to quickly achieve [whatever the task is]..."

Both effectively translate to, "We haven't started your silly task yet and we'll get around to it when we're good and ready, so stop asking or you'll still be waiting for it when The Rapture arrives."

Having typed those, I gotta go puke now.

Good on ya,

Goober Dave

 

RE: "Damp Squids"

I'm with Eric Thompson, never use a short word when a long word will do!

RE: "Damp Squids"

'Basically', 'obviously', and any other word that not so intelligent people often use to sound more intelligent, but usually only end up insulting intelligent people by using them. Just a back handed way of saying "hey stupid, everyone gets it but you".

RE: "Damp Squids"

tipping point..Used for anything and everything these days. AAAARGH!

RE: "Damp Squids"

Critical mass ... in the marketing not the atomic engineering sence.

RE: "Damp Squids"

"quantum jump"

which is actually the SMALLEST change that a quantized system can make.

Cheers

Greg Locock

SIG:Please see FAQ731-376: Eng-Tips.com Forum Policies for tips on how to make the best use of Eng-Tips.

RE: "Damp Squids"

(OP)
"Think outside the box."
i.e. we need a miracle (or a scapegoat) and you guys got elected.

JMW
www.ViscoAnalyser.com
 

RE: "Damp Squids"

Greg,

Although the common misuse of Quantum Jump (or Leap) is as you say, I've also had it explained to me (by a scientist type) that the term can be correct if it is applied to a sudden or abrupt change, rather than a large change.

cheers

RE: "Damp Squids"

What about 'the proof is in the pudding'? This drives me mad. The original expression made sense - 'The proof of the pudding is in the eating'. But: 'the proof is in the pudding'? Wouldn't it be illegible after baking? Is it an edible proof? Aaaaghh!

RE: "Damp Squids"

...any expression requiring air-quotes

...any type of communication from HR

RE: "Damp Squids"

water-resistant,

pharmaceutical blah blah claim claim blah blah... "consult your doctor"

anything someone who works in mold remediation will tell you if the word "toxic" is mentioned.

we're all on the same team here on this project....(followed by them erronously pointing out how your behaivor is against the team)



 

RE: "Damp Squids"

jmw, we do WAY TOO MUCH thinking "outside the box" at my company, we need to think inside the box a lot more:)

Mike

RE: "Damp Squids"

(OP)
"Synergy"
"Organic Growth"
I'm not sure even managers know what they mean with these two popular examples from the Management speak dictionary.

But one phrase that really, really [b]really[/b[ gets up my nose, popular with fight announcers and moronic compares,  "Give it up for..."
Where did this come from?
Whatever happened to "Show your appreciation please", " a round of applause please," or even (passably) "Put your hands together for..." but "Give it up for..."? Ugh!

Let's hope its a passing fad like "China Syndrome", I mean, who uses that any more?

JMW
www.ViscoAnalyser.com
 

RE: "Damp Squids"

"... it's not like it's brain surgery here..." (substitute for "rocket science")

Two that I just heard recently at separate companies having layoffs:

"Workforce realignment" - They aligned it, then needed to re-do that task? Sounded to me as though someone didn't "align" their workforce correctly in the first place.

"Logisctical restructuring" - Logic would dictate that a manager who made "logistical" into a word should be the first one "restructured"!


"If I had eight hours to chop down a tree, I'd spend six sharpening my axe." -- Abraham Lincoln  
For the best use of Eng-Tips, please click here -> FAQ731-376: Eng-Tips.com Forum Policies  

RE: "Damp Squids"

BINGO!!!

RE: "Damp Squids"

The superfluous first g in the oft mentioned Ying and Yang!

- Steve

RE: "Damp Squids"

jraef

I agree with both of these, very annoying:

"it's not like it's brain surgery here..." (Substitute for "rocket science")

But, even more teeth grindingly annoying, we had a manager that said:

"It's not brain science"!!!!!?????
 

RE: "Damp Squids"

Where I'm working, the common expression is It is rocket science.

I haven't heard At this moment in time for a long time.  It is management speak.  Engineers are more economical and tend to use now.

RE: "Damp Squids"

my boss used both "mute point" and "quantum leap" this week.  I smiled both times.
 

RE: "Damp Squids"

An ex of mine used say "six half dozen" and no matter how many times I tried to explain that it made no sense unless you used the entire phrase....then again, that's another reason she's an ex...

RE: "Damp Squids"

"We need some sort of accountability"
Its the current favorite here.

"We are realigning to better meet our future goals"
Posted after a recent layoff

The sayings which bother me are any containing the word synergy.  Office Space and Dilbert come to mind every time I hear it.

RE: "Damp Squids"

"Right sizing" appears to be the latest profanity here.

 

RE: "Damp Squids"

As I mentioned in another thread elsewhere, we've been right sized several times in the last couple of years and apparantly still aren't the right size as there's talk of pay cuts, or at least if we're the right size we're too expensive.

KENAT,

Have you reminded yourself of FAQ731-376: Eng-Tips.com Forum Policies recently, or taken a look at posting policies: http://eng-tips.com/market.cfm?

RE: "Damp Squids"

A Japanese/American company I used to work for went through a few Reductions In Force (RIFs) during my last few years with them.  Eventually, I got riffed too (now, I discovered recently, they need three people all week to do the job I used to do in 2½ days).  That was 12 years ago and they're riffing again.

RE: "Damp Squids"

How about "opportunities" or "Low Hanging Fruit"

We have a Quality Engineer that just LOVES to use those.

"A Designer knows that he has achieved Perfection not when there is nothing left to add, but when there is nothing left to take away"  - Antoine de Saint-Exupry

RE: "Damp Squids"

There's nothing wrong with "Low Hanging Fruit" when used in the right place & context.  Over at comp.soft-sys.matlab we use it all the time for simple questions.

- Steve

RE: "Damp Squids"

I guess that's what bothers me in this instance.  The only thing 'simple' about the problem is identifying it... and telling someone else to fix it.
In my vocabulary, if a problem is going to take 4 people and 3 months to investigate root causes and how to fix it, that is not 'low hanging fruit' or 'an opportunity'...that is a 'problem'.

"A Designer knows that he has achieved Perfection not when there is nothing left to add, but when there is nothing left to take away"  - Antoine de Saint-Exupry

RE: "Damp Squids"

Something like low hanging is fine in and of itself, it's a combination of mis-use and over use that cause the issue.

Velocity, as in we need to increase our product development velocity.

It's not wrong it's just using fancy terms when you don't need one.  Unless they really mean that they want to increase speed in the relevant direction (which is probably true), but I doubt half the people saying it know the distinction between speed and velocity.

KENAT,

Have you reminded yourself of FAQ731-376: Eng-Tips.com Forum Policies recently, or taken a look at posting policies: http://eng-tips.com/market.cfm?

RE: "Damp Squids"

"Low hanging fruit"

When I hear that I think of all the exposed fruit that the animals have gnawed on and the insects have spoiled. I chuckle out load every time I hear that phrase.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"It's the questions that drive us"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

RE: "Damp Squids"

(OP)
The alternative is "Cherry picking" which is something different, of course, if we make a logical interpretation, but management use these terms at will.
Nother favourite is "Organic Growth" whatever that means or is intended to mean, and "Synergistic" ... grrrr!

JMW
www.ViscoAnalyser.com
 

RE: "Damp Squids"

I thought "organic growth" was to do with recruitment from within rather than buying-in names (or companies)?  A good thing.

- Steve

RE: "Damp Squids"

Huh.  I would have thought "organic growth" would be growth that comes about naturally, rather than being forced.  But I don't speak businessese.

Hg

Eng-Tips policies:  FAQ731-376: Eng-Tips.com Forum Policies

RE: "Damp Squids"

Quote:

What about 'the proof is in the pudding'? This drives me mad. The original expression made sense - 'The proof of the pudding is in the eating'. But: 'the proof is in the pudding'?
I have used that expression ("the proof is in the pudding") many times.  Never knew it was incomplete.  Just heard it and repeated it without considering whether or not it made any sense.

Sort of like "The devil is in the details".  The devil is pretty universally considered a bad entity that we'd like to avoid.  So why do we say this to imply that details are important? (unless of course the person that you are encouraging to be meticulous happens to be a satanic worshipper).

=====================================
Eng-tips forums: The best place on the web for engineering discussions.

RE: "Damp Squids"

"Because you find the devil - i.e. the problem - in the details."

True story:

Lt Col (operator): Ah. So the solution to the problem is to make the radar waves vary their speed with distance from the transmitter."

Capt (engineer): momentary pause ... If you've got a couple of billion dollars handy, Sir, I would be glad to put a team together to research this for you.

The solution was indeed both simple and correct, but the details involved in implementation were a little tricky.

RE: "Damp Squids"

Thanks guys.  That is a step closer to making sense.  

=====================================
Eng-tips forums: The best place on the web for engineering discussions.

RE: "Damp Squids"

I have a co-worker, he is actually one of the principles in the firm I consult for.  Has an absolute inability to have an original thought.  He will state verbatim, any statement I make and add:  "Actually in fact".  It is now his idea.

We can discuss a Single line diagram, and I will say, "we are going to feed these substations at 34.5kV.  He will say, "We are going to feed these substations at 34.5kV actually in fact".  Voila! It is his thought.  I could directly contradict that with the very next sentance and he'll do it again, "actually in fact".  Another brilliant idea.  I can no longer tell if he is even aware he is doing this.  

In a group discussion he will repeat EVERYONE'S statements. The most annoying person I have ever worked with.

It is actually kind of fun to take him in circular arguments, where I can lead him to parrot idiotic conclusions and agree to everything only to lead him back to where we started and try to show him we just wasted an entire hour of four engineer's time.  He doesn't seem to notice.  There's that metacognition issue again!

Good day,
EEJaime

RE: "Damp Squids"

"he is actually one of the principles in the firm"

hahhahahaha!

I also see the following bold statement fairly often in Eng-Tips:

"I am bias"



 

- Steve

RE: "Damp Squids"

Lets just "put the peg in the sand" is the most annoying of all!

Mark Hutton


 

RE: "Damp Squids"

"step up to the plate"
"touch base"
"heads up"


 

FOETS
Some days you're the dog.
Some days you're just the hydrant.

RE: "Damp Squids"

From an email we got today:

"... - so bare with me."

No chance!

- Steve

RE: "Damp Squids"

"Let me speak honestly"  OK so weren't doing that before??

RE: "Damp Squids"

Oh my goodness i so HATE "touch base"! I'm allured into "touching base" with so many people throughout the day; I touch more bases than the Tampa Bay Devil Rays for goodness sakes.
An annoying saying that I'm giong to add to the tabe is "I don't know what to tell ya". Not only is it always said with "ya" and not "you", but it never seems to end there; whomever admitted complete ignorance about the topic at hand, merely moments before mind you, always seems to have a 5 page speech swirling around in their mind and further elaborates it to you for the next 20 minutes. Well, apparently, you DID know what to tell me. Liar.

RE: "Damp Squids"

I get annoyed when people mix up the use of who/whom and whoever/whomever. smile

- Steve

RE: "Damp Squids"

(OP)
SomptingGuy, you missed the big one:

"Whatever".

Very poplar with the young (under 21?), it is used when there is something they don't agree with but don't want to argue about and they're gonna do what they're gonna do anyway.
 

JMW
www.ViscoAnalyser.com
 

RE: "Damp Squids"

I know that I have already said this in another thread somewhere, but the term that [[i]really/i] irks me is "absolutely".  It is very seldom used in a context where absolutes apply, and only serves as a conversation filler.  Whatever...

"Good to know you got shoes to wear when you find the floor." - Robert Hunter
 

RE: "Damp Squids"

JMW, It was a gratuitous poke at the previous poster, hence the smiley.  I agree about whatever though, although it's reached the stage where cricising its use is tantamount to admitting being a fogey.

- Steve

RE: "Damp Squids"

"whatever" is simply the general equivalent to a married person's use of "yes, dear" as a dismissive term.

RE: "Damp Squids"

Now and then I still hear someone wanting to get the "wagons in a circle" or "ducks in a row" but I admit to sometimes throwing in a tongue in cheek "ducks in a circle". The fact of the matter is I didn't realise how many stupid expressions persist, until I waded through this forum topic.

RE: "Damp Squids"

I'm going to have to find a way to use "ducks in a circle" today.
 

RE: "Damp Squids"

Maybe this has been posted already, but:

Do you ever wonder why a sub-par performance is good for golf but bad for everything else?  :>)

RE: "Damp Squids"

Irregardless, proactive and winningest are three words that are my fingernails on the chalkboard...

RE: "Damp Squids"

What's wrong with 'proactive'?

RE: "Damp Squids"

Common in these troubled times;
'negative growth' and 'negative gains'

Why not call a spade a spade?
What's so wrong with using 'contraction' and 'losses'?

RE: "Damp Squids"

One of my favorites was when, in the early 90's, our marketing group spent hours trying to teach us to go after the "low hanging fruit".  While they seemed to have trouble with the concept and were sure that we did as well, I'm pretty sure that most of us "got it" in the first 10 seconds.....then spent the next 3 hours trying to forget it.

RE: "Damp Squids"

(OP)
Well, "low hanging fruit" and "cherry picking" are often confused by people and while they have your attention they mean to convert you to their way of thinking.

JMW
www.ViscoAnalyser.com
 

RE: "Damp Squids"

The oft repeated "global economic crisis" and "global financial crisis" are the ones that bother me.

RE: "Damp Squids"

Did anyone mention "step up to the plate"?  Found in another forum today.  

RE: "Damp Squids"

Yeah. "Step up to the plate", "take a swing at it", "keeep swing till you hit something", and don't remember to "touch base" once you do. Wow. I never realized that there were so many bloody annoying baseball references in these sayings. We've almost comprised an entire inning already...

RE: "Damp Squids"

You're on a sticky wicket there.

- Steve

RE: "Damp Squids"

From a well known f1 web site today:

"Formula One stands on the brink of upheaval"

- Steve

RE: "Damp Squids"

Nileo2005 (Mechanical)    16 Mar 09 8:19
Yeah. "Step up to the plate", "take a swing at it", "keeep swing till you hit something", and don't remember to "touch base" once you do. Wow. I never realized that there were so many bloody annoying baseball references in these sayings. We've almost comprised an entire inning already...

Tack on another one. My boss just adopted a very fond obsession with saying "Now we're in the ninth inning stretch!" at the beginning of the meeting wrap up... EVERY wrap up... Without fail. With how he manages to pick up one saying, repeat it a couple hundred times, and then blatantly forget it ever existed, I'm beginning to think he's part parrot.

RE: "Damp Squids"

We have a new manager that starts many sentences with "What it is is".  Intermixed with the often used spacer "OK".  One day he was driving me nuts with it.  I counted something like 12 "What it is is" and 20 "OK" in 5 minutes!

RE: "Damp Squids"

That's not really his/her fault.  These punctuation phrases infect really quickly and are hard to flush out.  Go on a two or three day off-site course with other engineers and you'll all be using the same phrases.  Maybe this manager has come from a place infected with "What it is is" disease?  I went on a course once that was thoroughly infected with "basically".  Took me ages to recover.

- Steve

RE: "Damp Squids"

SomptingGuy,
You are probably right.  After hearing this guy enough I catch myself using "What it is" occasionally.
Ed

RE: "Damp Squids"

It's been hard work, but I think I'm now rid of "touch base".
John

RE: "Damp Squids"

Nileo,

Tell your boss that baseball fans don't stretch in the ninth inning.  That's too late.  The middle of the seventh inning is customary.  But then he probably likes his phrase because he invented it.  

RE: "Damp Squids"

(OP)
"Damp Squids" is of course a corruption of "Damp Squibs".
Similarly we hear "Duck tape" rather than "Duct tape".ducky
 

JMW
www.ViscoAnalyser.com
 

RE: "Damp Squids"

I really, really get up in arms when the uppers tell me we don't need to re-invent the wheel, when, what we have just finished doing, is re-inventing the wheel.  It's just a very trite way of them saying that your idea is either too expensive (in their mind) or they cannot comprehend it and want a simpler solution that they can understand.  Oh well, the world is run by idiots, and always will be, I'm afraid.

RE: "Damp Squids"

Thanks for reminding me...

A long-time-ago and far-far-away... I worked as the lead USAF engineer at a Korean-Air aircraft maintenance depot in Pusan (Ok, Busan) ROK.

I had the privilage of working "shoulder-to-shoulder' with the somewhat inexperienced KAL Engineers. These guys were well educated and technically competant... but had relatively little exposure to the "real-world" of broken aircraft in need-of-fixin'.

The guys understood basic technical English, very well... but I had to re-learn english to be effective with them and enhance their understanding of technical situations.

HOWEVER, occasionally I would unintentionally throw colorful abbreviations or "language zingers" at them... and get this utterly puzzled look back as they tried to translate the meaning.

After a few months... and we were very comfortable with each-other... the guys DEMANDED that I explain these sayings and abbreviations in simple detail... so they could get the full magnitude of what I had just said. It was actually a challenge and re-learning experience for me... I had so many of these "expressions" that I was unaware of how much I depended on them, daily, to express myself, emotions, situations, technical concepts, etc. I soon appreciated the hillarity of their observations during my "fumbling explanations". Try explaining these in simple terms... I dare your...

AFU, BFH, BBFH, FIGMO, KIS, KISS (etc)
Shit's-gonna-hit-the-fan...
All dressed-up and no-place-to-go...
Lipstick on a Pig...
Not only NO, but HELL NO...
Help them "get-to-know-the-ropes..."
crock-of-shit, sack-of-shit...

plus lots of good-ones my esteemed collegues have already mentioned in this thread.

Note: a few actually made it into formal reports, which is how I got my nom-de-guerre from the QA NCOs: BF Hammer

Regards, Wil Taylor

RE: "Damp Squids"

Help them "get-to-know-the-ropes..."

Is a nautical term dating back to when ships had a lot of rope rigging used with the sales.

New sailors had to 'get-to-know-the-ropes' to be able to do their job.

This phrase entered the English dictionary as a phrase meaning 'learning how do do a new job/task'.

There you go, easywinky smile

KENAT,

Have you reminded yourself of FAQ731-376: Eng-Tips.com Forum Policies recently, or taken a look at posting policies: http://eng-tips.com/market.cfm?
What is Engineering anyway: FAQ1088-1484: In layman terms, what is "engineering"?

RE: "Damp Squids"

Kenat...

You got it (except it's sails... not sales)!

I also learned the fine art of flight-line cussing from a rather dynamic NCO... many times I had to "soften" my explantion when I spouted some really BAAAAD language... ILO teaching the guys the worst-of-the-worst of the english language (although I think they eventually took my soft-sell as a sign to do some off-hour "language research").

Regards, Wil Taylor

RE: "Damp Squids"

I will never forget the look of confusion/wonder when my Brit boss told his American team (and me) that we were "In the cack".

- Steve

RE: "Damp Squids"

How about "we need to get on the same page" which means "you need to educate me on all the stuff I should know but don't because I haven't been paying attention".

I'm sorry; did I say that out loud?

RE: "Damp Squids"

Relative to computer programs: Robust.

RE: "Damp Squids"

"We need to have discussions AROUND such-and-such an issue"

Why can't we just talk about the friggin issue?

On another one - imagine if you will me, laughing my ass off one evening while watching Eddie Issard describe Jesus doing "Big Arms" at the last supper, and then trying to remain composed in a meeting of all the company brass the next day when the manager sitting in front of me did an amazing impression of "Big Arms" while saying "We must get our arms around this!"  Just the picture of that manager in the royal blue outfit was enough to sent me over.  I was nearly excused from the meeting.

RE: "Damp Squids"

"Speak of the Devil"

Why do I keep hearing that around here?

RE: "Damp Squids"

A radio presenter this morning said:

"You don't do that when someone's just given you a gift horse in the mouth"

- Steve

RE: "Damp Squids"

Afraid I'm guilty of using "it's not rocket science".

Then I thought - in its simplest form, rocket science is about as simple and fundamental as it gets. It's mechanics that you learn at the age of 14. Ignoring details like gravity varying with altitude, variable payload as fuel burns, etc, it's pretty easy. F=ma.

Of course, the devil's in the detail.

John

RE: "Damp Squids"

The trouble is, it really IS rocket science...

How many of our problems could be avoided if a few people just considered simple, basic science before decisions were made...

old field guy

RE: "Damp Squids"

I know this is an old thread, but I've just started a new job and all I've heard here is talk of sitting down.

"We need to sit down about this..."
"You, me and him will sit down and sort this out"

Apparently no one discuses anything any more, simply sits down on them.

RE: "Damp Squids"

Like rerig, we have "That being said..." said quite a bit around the office.

We also have "control our own destiny" and "eat the elephant", which always makes me chuckle. I picture a pride of lions chowing down on an elephant growling and snarling the whole the time and wonder how much snarling there will be on the project.

There was a great Dilbert with the pointy-haired boss saying to Alyce "I want to dialog with you about your current project" and her freaking out with fist of death that dialog wasn't a verb.

RE: "Damp Squids"

"Yeah-no" to begin a reply. Is this one only a UK problem so far or has it crossed the waters? I could just about give it space to live if it was used at the beginning of a confirmation to a negative statement: "Yeah, no, that wasn't the right thing to do." But ALL THE TIME? Arrgh.

RE: "Damp Squids"

One of my bosses would regularly describe an impatient person as "biting at the champ" and his plans would often "come to fruitition". My current boss uses "In the real world" to mean: "The inertia of the system is sufficient to damp or render totally obscure the glitches caused by my c**p programming.

RE: "Damp Squids"

"Apples and oranges" I have heard plenty of...

RE: "Damp Squids"

Here's a couple of others ...

"Run it up the flag pole!"
Possibly with "And see who salutes"

"Drill Down"  

RE: "Damp Squids"

"Quantum Leap" is acceptable by me.  A lot of the feeling that this phrase is wrong because individual quanta are very small is wrongheaded in my book.  Although the change in engergy states is very small, it is discrete, i.e. digital.  So although the jump may be small, it couldn't be smaller.  So in a literal sence (I use this phrase with trepidation though, I think, correctly here)a quantum leap is opposed to a gradual shift which one might call an analog transformation.  Perhaps I'm mixing metaphors badly.

I can't stand dialog used as a verb.  Verbing weirds nouns.

One of my favorite Dilberts is where the Pointy Haired Boss suggests a problem be dealt with on "a going forward basis." and Dilbert thanks him for ruling out time travel, which is more useful then he usually is.  I swear that if I ever hear a boss use that phrase I'll use Dilbert's response.

-Kirby

Kirby Wilkerson

Remember, first define the problem, then solve it.

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