ok, assume your load is 64 tons (there's your SF = 4)
the worst geometry is when the base is the widest (why?)
assume you have the load applied where the spreader diagonal members attach to the spreader bar, 32 tons both sides (you need the CG of the load under the suspension point, justifying an equal load distribution). so you know the vertical component of the load in the diagonal member, and the angle, so you can calculate the tension load in the diagonal member, and size it.
you can also calculate the compression load in the spreader bar (the horizontal component of the diagonal load). You can calculate the euler load (of rather the section needed to carry this as an euler column) ... remember the speader bar can buckle about either axis.
If the load is going to be suspended from the spreader bar between the ends of the diagonal (rather than at the ends) this will complicate things ... the spreader bar becomes a beam column.
how will you adjust the length of the diagonal members to suit to different width on the spreader bar ? 12' long and 3' high means diagonal members 6.7' long, 10' (1' less at both ends) and 3' high means 5.8' long diagonals (using the 6.7' length for the diagonal means a height of 4.5')